took this foto on sunday.....I thought it represented purity....

some thought....

mmm...sometimes I keep wondering...y ppl have so much hatred/dislike in them...or y r they so egoistic ..... lot of them cannt forego it....it would be exaggurating if I said I didnt have ego.....but not any more ........when I was abt 20 or so I couldnt compromise my ego N didnt actually talk with one of my closebuddy...I did talk...none of them knew tht we were having a cold war...thts wht I say...I did everything N she did everything but the closeness tht we shared was missing....it was as if we were being nice to each other...as we didnt want anyone to speculate about our freindship...and after 4 yrs we broke the barriage...when I think abt it I jus feel tht I was acting like a kid.....jo aapna bath mana ne ke liye...kuch bhi kartha hai....but I am no more like tht.. ....now even if I have somesort of misunderstanding I try to clarify it...I dont feel anysort of ego to go and talk with the other person...I feel tht some one should take the 1st step...I have no problem in taking the 1st step...as I have realized how hard it was to take the 1st step...to forego ego....its not worth to lose so much of time... life is short ...its like "Pyar ke liye poori zindagi kam padthi hai...jane kaha log nafrat ke liye waqt nikal lethe hai" N if I jus go on stop talking with ppl ...or I am tring to be nice to other person...I would be at loss...with a bitter feeling towards everyone...I am not gaining any thng from it...except for some sort of dislike/hate towards others...I am not proving any point. to anyone not even to me...now I cannt really say tht I have overcomed it completely...but definetly I did...and when I encounter ppl like me(past me)...I am like...this is me......which brings a cresent on my face....I am happy.....rather I should say at peace.....y am I talking or thinking all this......may be becoz I c ppl hating...disliking other ppl so much...Iseral and lebonon ...... India and pakistan....US A/West and so called terrorists groups.......each one of them have a false ego...which they bread.....n even if one wants to compromise the other party doesnt want...even it cost lifes of innocent humans.....

one month

its almost one month......
the restless ness is not much....its kind of numb....except for odd day I dont feel anything abt anything....thts kind of odd...I c the feelings or wht U call the human reactions are slowly ending....I no more feel attracted to anything...I am not eager or enthusiastic abt anythng....I have seen my self transforming into this......I no more feel bored...or excited.....days jus pass...wht I want from life....this question pops up regularly.....for which I have no answers......I do a lot of daydreaming...but exactly I dont know wht I want from life or wht am I searching....I donnow....
nowadays...I become imaptient sudeenly...jus for few mins... hardly last for 2 min.....then everything is normal....